Andalusian Dream: Your Private Farmhouse Oasis with Pool near Antequera!
Andalusian Dream: My Not-So-Perfect, Totally Awesome Farmhouse Escape (Near Antequera!) - A Hot Mess Review!
Okay, people, let's get one thing straight: I'm not a travel blogger. More like a reformed couch potato fueled by wanderlust and a serious caffeine addiction. But after my recent almost flawless stay at the "Andalusian Dream" farmhouse near Antequera, I felt compelled to spill the beans. Prepare for a review that’s less polished Instagram and more… well, me.
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Getting There (And My First Mishap):
The website promised "effortless access." They weren't lying technically, but let's just say my GPS and I had a spirited debate about the definition of "road" during the drive. Think winding, narrow lanes where you pray you don't meet a tractor. On the plus side? Stunning views of the Andalusian countryside. On the minus? I almost drove my rental car into a ditch. Twice. But hey, at least it provided a good story later, right?
Accessibility – Real Talk:
This is important, so I'll get serious for a sec. The website boasted "facilities for disabled guests." Now, I'm not in a wheelchair myself, so my experience is second-hand. But, observationally, the main areas – the pool, the restaurant, most of the ground floor – seemed relatively accessible. (This needs further verification, and I'm hoping to update this section with more specific details later by following my own suggestion.) There's an elevator, which is a great plus. The surrounding pathways might pose a challenge for some wheelchairs, but overall, it felt like they'd made an effort.
Entering the Dream (and Almost Getting Naked):
Check-in was smooth, and contactless. But the guy at reception, bless his heart, had a limited grasp of English. We sorted it out eventually, but not before I accidentally wandered into what I thought was the elevator, but turned out to be a stairwell. Awkward. I nearly walked in on someone changing. Note to self: maybe try wearing my glasses during check-in.
The Room – Okay, this is where the good stuff starts (and the bad makes it even BETTER):
Okay, the room… OMG. I booked a "non-smoking" room (essential for me, because I'm not a smoker. But I'm getting off track…). It was huge. Seriously, the size of my apartment back home. "Extra long bed" indeed! The "seating area" was basically a whole living room. And the view? Chef's kiss. Rolling hills, olive groves… pure Instagram bait (yes, I succumbed). The "air conditioning" worked like a dream after the sun. The "blackout curtains" were essential for my sleep-loving soul. It had "complimentary tea" and a "coffee/tea maker" to satisfy my caffeine needs.
But here's the real juicy detail: The bathroom. Oh, the bathroom. I'm a sucker for a good bathroom. It had a "separate shower/bathtub" (thank you, sweet baby Jesus), "slippers", and "bathrobes." But the most glorious detail was a "window that opens". And not just any window. This window opened out to another spectacular view. It was amazing! The "mirror" offered great lightning for my evening ritual of putting makeup. It was all just so perfect. I might live there forever!
(And the "extra long bed" nearly ate me) – My Near-Death Experience with Comfort:
Okay, before you judge me, I'm going to tell you about the bed. The "extra-long bed" was a trap. A fluffy, luxurious, cloud-like trap. I didn't want to get out of it. I literally had to peel myself off those sheets every morning. It was that good.
(And the not-so-perfect part):
They also had a fridge filled with mini bar items. However, the mini-bar was poorly stocked - and I'm blaming that on the recent supply chain issues. No matter, I still loved the space.
Food, Glorious Food! (and my love for the Poolside Bar):
The "restaurants" (there was a small one and a bigger one) offered a decent range. "Breakfast [buffet]" was… well, it was a buffet. Eggs, pastries, fruit, the usual. They did offer "Asian cuisine in restaurant," but I'm wary of that, not having faith in a place being great at multiple cuisines. My favorite part was undoubtedly the "Poolside bar." That was pure bliss. Sipping a cocktail by the "swimming pool [outdoor]" with that view? Absolute heaven. They had "desserts in the restaurant" which I did have, and were truly great. "Coffee/tea in the restaurant" was free, and I took full advantage.
Relaxation Station (Where I Spent Most of My Time):
Okay, let's talk about the "Spa/sauna" because I'm all about self-care. They have a "Steamroom" and a "sauna". I'm not sure about the "Body scrub," but it's possible. The "Pool with view" was honestly the main reason I came. The "massage" was a must. I also spent some time on the "terrace" with a book. The "fitness center" was on the list, but I may have skipped out on that. I was too busy eating tapas by the pool.
Cleanliness and Safety (Crucial, Especially Now):
Let’s be real, I am always a little germaphobe, and I'm even more cautious these days, and thankfully this place gets a solid A+. There were signs of "anti-viral cleaning products." Hand sanitizer was everywhere. They even let me "opt-out" of room cleaning so I could do my own thing. The staff were all properly "Staff trained in safety protocol".
Services and Conveniences – The Perks that Made me Feel Like a Queen (or at Least a Tired Peasant):
The "Concierge" was super helpful with arranging a taxi service (and that's not an easy thing to arrange in Antequera!). "Concierge" and "dry cleaning" were really good. The "daily housekeeping" was a dream. Having someone make your bed and tidy up? Pure luxury. The "luggage storage" was helpful. The "cash withdrawal" was a nice touch. The "gift/souvenir shop" was handy for last-minute presents I "needed".
For the Kids (I don’t have any, but I noticed):
They had a "babysitting service." I noticed a couple of families there, and they looked like they were having a great time. They had "family/child friendly" amenities.
Getting Around (and More Near-Disasters): I took advantage of the "car park [free of charge]" and "car park [on-site]." I was nervous, and that made me take the "taxi service."
Things to Do (Besides Lounging by the Pool and Avoiding Tractors):
Antequera itself is a beautiful town. You can visit the "shrine," walk around, or visit the "meeting/banquet facilities". I can't provide a full evaluation of this category, as I did not engage in all activities.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking (My Personal Olympics):
I took full advantage of the "a la carte in restaurant." I enjoyed the "bar." I ate all the "salad in restaurant." There was a "snack bar" as well, and multiple "restaurants." They had an "International cuisine in restaurant." They had a "vegetarian restaurant."
Some of the categories, as you can tell, I did not cover fully.
My Verdict: Absolutely Go (With a Few Caveats):
The "Andalusian Dream" farmhouse near Antequera is mostly a dream come true. It's beautiful, relaxing, and the perfect escape from reality. Yes, there are a few quirks, and maybe a few hiccups along the way. But that's what makes it memorable, right?
Highly Recommended. Just… maybe pack a good map (and insurance).
Final Score: 4.5 out of 5 (lost half a point for the near-death tractor experience and the slightly limited English skills of the staff, but gained a point for the amazing bed!)
Unbelievable Chalet Apartment in Saalbach-Hinterglemm: Ski-In/Ski-Out Luxury Awaits!
Okay, buckle up buttercup, because this isn't your average, pristine itinerary. This is my attempt at a real Andalusia adventure, farmhouse vibes and all. Prepare for potential tangents, existential crises about olive oil, and the distinct possibility I'll forget to pack underwear. Let's go!
Title: Operation: Sun-Kissed & Slightly Sunburnt – My Andalusian Antics (and Maybe a Few Tears)
Dates: October 26th - November 2nd (Because, let's be honest, summer's over, and I needed ANY escape)
Location: A "Rustic Charm" Farmhouse with Pool in Antequera, Spain (Praying "Rustic Charm" doesn’t translate to "Moldy Cellar of Horrors.")
Day 1: Arrival – The Great Spanish Embrace…or Disappointment?
Morning (ish): Flight from [Insert City Here – It's a Secret, I'm Playing Hard to Get]. Actually, the morning started at 4 AM because, airport anxiety. Seriously, who designed those security lines?! Anyway, plane. Ugh, airplane food. I swear, they’re scientifically designed to make you question every life choice.
Afternoon: Arrive in Malaga. Thank god for the airport pick up service ordered, because I am hopeless with directions even with GPS. The drive to Antequera. Oh, the scenery! Rolling hills, olive groves stretching for miles… I immediately want to quit my life and become an olive farmer. (Spoiler: I won't. I kill houseplants).
Late Afternoon/Evening: Arrive at the farmhouse. Fingers crossed. Okay, so it IS "rustic charm," which also means "slightly dusty," but the pool looks AMAZING. The house is much better than the photos. I think I might actually cry (happy tears, hopefully)
- Initial Thoughts: Okay, this is actually amazing. I’m already obsessed with the courtyard, the smell of the herbs, and the sheer, blissful QUIET. Except the cockerel, I already hate that little guy.
- Imperfection Alert: Found a dead spider in the bathroom. My arachnophobia almost made me pack my bags. Deep breaths, it's a Spanish farmhouse, not a five-star hotel, grow up.
Evening: Quick grocery run. Panic buying ensues. This is where I probably overbought everything – chorizo, jamón, olives, ALL THE WINE. This is going to be expensive. Back to the house. Unpack. Crack open a bottle of local wine. Ahhhhh.
Day 2: Antequera's Wonders & Cultural Clumsiness
- Morning: Breakfast on the terrace. The sun is warm, the coffee is strong. This is the life! I feel like I could write a novel here. Or, at least, a very long grocery list.
- Late Morning/Afternoon: Explore Antequera. The "Dolmens Site" is incredible… but also requires a lot of walking. I, being a creature of leisure and questionable fitness, started to flag. The climb to the Alcazaba, beautiful views, but my knees are protesting. And I, in my infinite wisdom, decided to wear new shoes. Big mistake.
- Anecdote: I attempted to order something in Spanish. It was a disaster. The server’s face… pure amusement. I ended up pointing and shrugging, which, somehow, worked. I, at least, learned that the word "agua" means water. Baby steps.
- Afternoon: Lunch in the town square. Gazpacho. Delicious. Then, a nap. Because, again, creature of leisure.
- Evening: Back to the farmhouse. Pool time! Hours spent soaking up the sun, reading, and contemplating the meaning of life. (Mostly pizza, which is my meaning of life).
- Quirky Observation: The pool is colder than I expected, but also the most perfect thing in the world. The sound of cicadas is hypnotic. I suspect I might never leave.
- Evening: Home cooked Meal. Fail. We have a kitchen, right? I'm going to give cooking a shot. Famous last words. I mean, it's unlikely to be edible.
Day 3: Ronda - The Cliffside City & Tourist Traps
- Morning (Early, Ugh): Drive to Ronda, a city perched dramatically on cliffs. The drive, winding through the mountains, is stunning. Actually, it is stunning. I even take a photo of a scenic route.
- Late Morning/Afternoon: Ronda. The Puente Nuevo is INCREDIBLE. Seriously heart stopping. The views from the bridge are breathtaking. However, the crowds… oh, the crowds. It’s a beautiful place, absolutely, but prepare yourself, my friends.
- Emotional Reaction: I had a brief moment of "I'm-so-overwhelmed-by-beauty-I-might-actually-cry" syndrome. Then a very real moment of "I-need-a-drink-and-a-nap" syndrome.
- Afternoon: Lunch in Ronda. Found a small, more hidden tapas place. Finally escaping the selfie stick hellscape. Finally.
- Late Afternoon: Explore the Plaza de Toros (bullring). I'm no fan of bullfighting, but the structure itself is impressive. The history is intriguing, even if the activity itself is not my cup of tea.
- Evening: Back to the farmhouse. Another pool session, more wine. This is becoming a habit.
- Messy Rambling: Thinking about the day, the bridge, the crowds. Feeling a bit of a "been there, done that" vibe regarding the major tourist spots. But so what? It needs to be experienced. That sounds a bit pretentious, doesn't it? Let’s have another glass of wine.
Day 4: The Heart of Andalusia - Olive Oil & White Villages
- Morning: A quest for olive oil. I want to visit an olive farm. This is my life's mission for today. Do some research. Find a farm, hopefully, that is not just a tourist trap. The drive is beautiful, this whole region must be incredible.
- Afternoon: The Olive Farm! They have the best olive oil I have ever tasted, it’s incredible. I could drown in it. I do, in fact, buy far too many bottles. The people were so friendly; I felt like a local.
- Late Afternoon: Visit a white village. It is beautiful! I have to be honest. At this point, I am so relaxed I could just do nothing.
- Evening: Cooking class. I found one! I did try and failed again, but had an absolute blast! I made the worst paella. I should learn that I am never going to learn to properly cook.
Day 5: Lazy Day. Repeat of Yesterday.
- Morning/Afternoon/Evening: Pool. Sun. Wine. Read. Nap. Repeat. Maybe I'll wear my underwear today?
- Opinionated Language: Screw productivity. This is exactly what I need. No regrets.
- Stream-of-Consciousness Rambles: Thinking about how much I love the simple things: sunshine, good company (even if it’s just me), and a book. Maybe I'll try to learn some more Spanish. Maybe not. Maybe just order more wine. Decisions, decisions…
Day 6: Granada and the Alhambra – Overwhelming Beauty
- Morning: Drive to Granada. It's a fair distance. We are going to be tired.
- Afternoon: The Alhambra. The most beautiful place in the world. Just breathtaking. Even the crowds can’t ruin it.
- Emotional Reaction: Tears. Real, actual tears of pure, unadulterated awe. I swear. The gardens! The architecture! The history! I’m completely overwhelmed.
- Evening: Tapas tour in Granada. Every single place is amazing. I was already full. I did eat everything, and it was fantastic.
- Evening: Drive back to the farmhouse. Exhausted and deeply, deeply happy.
Day 7: Farewell Antequera – Time to Say Goodbye (and Buy More Olive Oil)
- Morning: Breakfast on the terrace, one last time. Packing. Feeling a deep sadness at the thought of leaving.
- Imperfection Alert: Accidentally left the lid of the olive oil on the counter. My brain has turned to mush from the relaxation.
- Afternoon: Last swim in the pool. Soak it up. Reflect. Feel.
- Late Afternoon: Drive back to Malaga. Fly home.
- Evening: The flight. Back home. Reality.
Day 8: Reality
- Morning: Back to work.
- Afternoon: The bills are waiting.
- Evening: Planning my return to Spain.
Budget (Vaguely):
- Flights: Ouch.
- Accommodation: Worth it!
- Food, Wine, Olive Oil: Send help.
- Everything Else: See above. Add some more.
Overall Assessment:
This trip was a messy, wonderful, slightly chaotic, and
Escape to Paradise: Your Dreamy Achterhoek Farmhouse Awaits!
Andalusian Dream: Your Private Farmhouse Oasis FAQ (Because Let's Be Real, You'll Have Questions)
Okay, So… What *Exactly* is Andalusian Dream? Is it, like, a real dream? Because sometimes I dream I can fly, and that's never worked out.
Haha, yeah, it's real. As real as the sunburn you'll probably get. It's a private farmhouse near Antequera, Spain. We're talking a traditional Andalusian Cortijo – stone walls, terracotta tiles, the whole shebang. Think "Under the Tuscan Sun" but with more… well, more me. Honestly, the pictures *don't* do it justice. They always make things look… perfect. Trust me, it’s better. Like, *much* better. My first thought when I walked in was, "Holy mother of olives, I need a nap here! And a bottle of Rioja." And yes, there's a pool. A proper one; no paddling pool nonsense.
My partner, bless his heart, thought it was just 'nice'. He's a pragmatist. I, on the other hand, wanted to move in right then and there. I mean, imagine waking up to the sun streaming in, that gorgeous scent of rosemary, and the only sound being the distant clinking of a goat bell... or maybe that was just a figment of my imagination. Still, it's magical.
Can I actually swim in the pool? Because some 'pools' are just glorified bird baths. I've been burned before.
YES! You can absolutely swim in the pool! It's a good-sized pool, deep end and all. You can actually *swim* in it, unlike some tiny dip-tanks I've encountered. I spent half my time there, honestly. I might as well have been a drowned rat, prunes and all. It was *glorious*. Especially after a day of exploring. Honestly, the pool was a lifesaver. The Spanish sun is not to be trifled with. I forgot my sun cream once and regretted it dearly. Never again, never again.
The pool is well-maintained, clean, and just the right temperature to feel refreshing but not icy. We had some incredibly heated debates about the best way into the poool, by the way. My partner insisted on the gentle steps but I was all about the dramatic dive. (He won, he always does.)
How far is it from Antequera? Because I need my tapas fix. And maybe some shopping. Real talk.
It's a manageable drive, maybe 15-20 minutes to Antequera. Seriously, this is a good thing. You're far enough out to feel secluded and escape the hustle and bustle of city life, but close enough to get your fix of tapas, historical sites (the dolmens are seriously cool), and, of course, any retail therapy you need. Honestly, the tapas in Antequera are amazing. Don't leave without trying the Porra Antequerana (it's a kind of chilled tomato soup, but better than it sounds) . And the shops... oh, the shops. They have everything from local crafts to gorgeous leather goods. My credit card took a beating. No regrets. (Okay, maybe a few...)
It's definitely a car situation, though. You'll need one, unless you're a super-hitchhiker which, let's face it, is a bit of a gamble. Parking in Antequera isn't *too* horrendous.
Is it kid-friendly? Because my offspring are like a hurricane in small person form.
That, my friend, is the million-dollar question. Yes, it *can* be kid-friendly, depending on *your* kids. The pool, of course, requires vigilance. Seriously, no one wants a tragedy. And there are some steps... well, it's not a wheelchair-friendly place, let's say that (and there is a big step down at the entrance.) But the farmhouse itself is spacious, with plenty of room for kids to run around (supervised, of course).
Think wide open spaces, some basic steps to the pool and the house itself, and chances for exploring. (This is where you reign them in.) There's a decent garden. You need to check the specifics with your rental. Some farms are more geared up for families than others. The owners are usually very helpful, so ask. If your kids are chill, it'll be heavenly. If they're tiny tyrants, well... bring LOTS of wine.
Okay, okay, the pool is good, but what about the *insider* details? Is the kitchen well-equipped? Is the internet reliable? What about the beds? Be honest.
Alright, here's the unvarnished truth. The kitchen *should* be well-equipped. Hopefully, it has everything you need to cook. I mean, it depends. You'll need to check with your rental company. It's usually got the basics. Last time, I made a spectacular mess (and a pretty good paella, to be fair). The internet… right. Let's just say it's "rural internet." It's not going to be blazing fast. It's more "enough to check emails and post a few sunset pics on Instagram" rather than "streaming HD movies all day.” But hey, you're on holiday, right? Disconnect a little. Embrace the tranquility. Embrace the bliss. (Or, you know, download all the things beforehand.)
The beds: Comfort is key. The beds were comfortable enough, but honestly, after all the hiking and swimming, I could have slept on a slab of concrete. The sheets? Clean, which is all that matters. The pillows? Well, I'm picky. I'd bring my own next time. But overall, good. Just good.
And a word of advice: read the welcome packet. Or, you know, skim it. There's usually some useful info in there about the local area, and any quirks of the property (like, "the water pressure sometimes dips when the goat farmer is irrigating his fields.") Don’t be an idiot like me.
What's the best thing about Andalusian Dream, in your opinion? And the worst? Be brutally honest.
Okay, best thing? The absolute *peace*. Seriously. That feeling of being away from it all, just soaking up the sun, the silence (mostly), and the sheer beauty of the place. The air smells amazing, the views are breathtaking, and you can genuinely *relax*. It’s a proper escape. The pool is a solid second. I mean, I could just live in that pool, honestly.
Worst thing? Trying to find the damn place the first time. The directions were a bit… vague. (That's putting it mildly.) We got lost, nearly argued (a minor blip, of course!), and ended up asking a very confused farmer for help. He spoke no English and we spoke even less Spanish. After about 20 minutes of frantic hand-gesturing, we finally found it. Next time… I’m hiring a local guide. The drive up is a little... windy. And I am not good with heights and a lot of those hairpin turns had me clutching the dashboard and muttering to myself.
Oh, And then one day I lost my keys. After spending the whole time taking photos, I could not find them anywhereEasy Hotel Hunt
