Escape to Paradise: Your Dream Benissa Moraira Villa Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into a review that's less "polished brochure" and more "diary entry after a few too many poolside cocktails." We're gonna get real about this place, the good, the bad, and the slightly terrifyingly sanitized. I'm talking unfiltered opinions, messy thoughts, and the kind of truth that only comes from someone who's actually been there.
SEO & Metadata: (Let's get this out of the way first, because, let's be honest, we all Google before we book.)
- Keywords: Hotel Review, Accessibility, Spa, Fitness, Dining, Wi-Fi, Swimming Pool, COVID-19 Safety, Luxury Hotel, Family-Friendly, Wheelchair Accessible, Restaurants, Room Service, [Hotel Name - Assume the name here, I don't have one!], South Asia, Leisure Travel, Business Travel.
- Meta Description: Unfiltered hotel review dives into accessibility, spa treatments, dining experiences & COVID-19 safety protocols. Discover if this South Asian luxury hotel delivers on its promise, with authentic insights & honest opinions.
My Brain vs. This Hotel (Let the Chaos Begin!)
Right, so let's just say I’m not exactly a "smooth operator." I'm more of a "slightly frazzled traveler who needs a week away from the world… preferably with unlimited coffee and a decent pool." And with that, let the reviewing begin.
Accessibility: The Holy Grail (and Hopefully Not a Trip Hazard)
Okay, first things first: Accessibility. This is HUGE for me. I've got a wonky knee, so I spend half my life battling escalators that hate me, and my back's a seasoned skeptic. This hotel claims to be accessible… and I gotta say, they mostly delivered. Wheelchair accessible? Seemed so. Ramps were actually ramps, not death traps disguised as architecture. Elevators? Check. That, my friends, is a win. Major points for that. They even had facilities for disabled guests, which, thank god, included grab bars in the bathroom. (Thank you, sweet baby Jesus.) Now, the elevator was a little slower than a snail on Valium, but hey, I’m on vacation, right? I was a bit hesitant with the exterior corridor as they have the potential to be a bit too rustic for my liking but I didn't find an issue with this property.
On-site accessible restaurants / lounges - I also noticed they had this, a huge win for folks who need a straightforward route for getting a coffee. The staff were also good at this.
Internet – The Lifeline (and Potential Source of Eternal Frustration)
Let’s talk internet. Because honestly, in the modern world, it's not a luxury; it's oxygen. Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! – YES! They actually delivered. Internet access (LAN) was also available. I did appreciate the Internet services on offer. The Wi-Fi in public areas was pretty solid, too. And it was nice that they had Internet. Overall, connectivity was acceptable. However, trying to upload photos to Instagram from the pool was like watching paint dry. Again, first world problems, but still, a minor grumble.
Room Specifics: My Personal Fortress (with Optional Blackout Curtains!)
Okay, now for the nitty-gritty. My room. (Drumroll, please!)
- Available in all rooms: Oh, the essentials. Daily housekeeping, air conditioning, wake-up service (thank you, I’m terrible at mornings), hair dryer (a godsend, because wet hair and humidity are my personal nightmare). And a goddamn free Wi-Fi that actually worked. They got it right with the basics.
- More Stuff: The air conditioning actually worked (hallelujah). I appreciated the alarm clock. The bathrobes were seriously fluffy, perfect for lounging around, plotting my next nap. Bathtub AND Separate shower/bathtub. Score! They even had a mirror that didn't make me look like a crypt keeper.
- Things That Matter (to Me): Blackout curtains. They were magnificent. I could sleep through a hurricane. The desk was perfect for my "working from vacation" pretend work. The mini bar was… well, I’m not going to say how often I visited it. The refrigerator kept my late night snacks cold. And a safe box is always a good thing. The sofa was comfy! Plus, they'd left a bottle of free bottled water. I like free water.
- Irritations: The soundproofing was a bit questionable. I could still hear the happy hour revelers downstairs, even with the blackout curtains and earplugs. (Perhaps I need stronger earplugs). The scale was a cruel reminder of the buffet situation earlier that day.
Dining, Drinking & Snacking: My Stomach's Grand Adventure
Okay, this is where things got interesting. Because I love to eat. And I love to drink. And this hotel had options. Lots of options.
- The Restaurants: This place had restaurants. Plural! Buffet in restaurant – a siren call to my inner glutton. They offered Asian cuisine in restaurant, international cuisine in restaurant, and Western cuisine in restaurant. I tried them all, of course. The Asian breakfast was divine. The coffee/tea in restaurant was strong enough to wake the dead. The salad in restaurant helped to mitigate the guilt of the pastries. The desserts in restaurant… let’s just say I may have gained a few pounds. (Worth it.)
- The Bar: There was a bar. A poolside bar even. And a happy hour. Need I say more? (Probably not, but I will anyway!)
- Room Service: Room service [24-hour] – another siren song. I may or may not have ordered fries at 3 a.m. (I totally did.)
- Things I Appreciated: Bottle of water in the room (again, free water = happy camper). Coffee shop for a quick caffeine fix. They even had alternative meal arrangement. The vegetarian restaurant was great too.
Things to Do: Amusement Overload! (or at least, a Distraction)
- Ways to Relax: The spa was… well, let’s just say, I spent a LOT of time there. They offered a body scrub, a body wrap, and every kind of massage you could imagine. I'm pretty sure I achieved a state of zen I never knew existed. The sauna and steamroom were great. Plus, yes, the foot bath was amazing.
- The Fitness Center: I attempted to use the fitness center. Emphasis on "attempted." I did, however, spend a significant amount of time trying to decipher how the machines worked. (Apparently, lifting heavy things is the opposite of relaxing. Who knew?)
- The Pool: The swimming pool [outdoor] was large, beautiful, and had a pool with a view. The poolside bar was a definite plus.
- Things to Ignore (… mostly): Look, I didn't make it to the gym/fitness because of the spa – so perhaps there's a connection?
Cleanliness & Safety: COVID-19 (aka, The Germinator)
This is where it gets real, because even fun-loving, sleep-deprived travel writers have standards.
- The Good Stuff: This hotel, bless its heart, was on it. They had hand sanitizer everywhere. Staff were wearing masks (thank god). Physical distancing of at least 1 meter. Daily disinfection in common areas. Rooms sanitized between stays. I did appreciate that they are using anti-viral cleaning products. Professional-grade sanitizing services: These were all great.
- I Liked: The Individually-wrapped food options. The safe dining setup. The staff trained in safety protocol.
- I Really Liked: The room sanitization opt-out available. Because, sometimes, you just want to hide in your slightly messy room.
- The Okay Stuff: Sanitized kitchen and tableware items - felt good and safe.
- The Somewhat Worrying Stuff: I didn't notice Sterilizing equipment at all.
- Things I Missed: Hmm, I felt like there was something missing here. I'm glad they are taking this seriously, but I'm not sure I feel totally safe. I saw no Hygiene certification.
Services & Conveniences: The Little Things That Make a Difference (or Annoy the Hell Out of You)
- The Helpful Stuff: Concierge – super helpful when I needed a recommendation for a tailor (because, vacation). Daily housekeeping – thank you, again. Laundry service - it was a lifesaver. **
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your slick, airbrushed travel itinerary. This is the real deal, Casa Baars edition. Benissa Moraira, here we freakin' come! (Hopefully. My passport's in a safe place… I think.)
Casa Baars: A Messy, Magnificent Mess (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Paella)
Pre-Trip Chaos (aka The Calm Before the Vacation Storm):
- Month of May (and prior): The planning phase. Oh, the planning. Endless scrolling through Instagram, dreaming of turquoise waters and sun-drenched tapas. Flights booked (thank god! Price was a steal and now cancelled! I'm still bitter about that), Casa Baars reserved (fingers crossed it looks as good in person as it does on Airbnb), and a vague understanding of where Benissa Moraira actually is (it's somewhere near Valencia, right? Deep breath).
- Important Note: I convinced myself I knew enough Spanish to survive. "Uno cerveza, por favor!" is apparently the extent of my vocab. This will be a problem. A delightful problem.
- One Week Before: Panic Stations. Start making a packing list. Realize I haven't been to the gym in approximately… ever, and the thought of squeezing into a swimsuit is genuinely terrifying. Reschedule that gym trip. Pack the oversized linen shirts, and the 'I'm on vacation, leave me alone' attitude.
- The Day Before: Last-minute scramble. Did I remember the adapter? Did I book the airport transfer? Did I even pack sunscreen?! Call my friend, panic, have a glass of wine (or two), try to convince myself I'm a well-organized, capable human being. Fail.
Day 1: Arrival and Utter Bewilderment
- Morning: The flight! Shaky, nervous, my ears pop so violently they feel like they're going to explode. Land in Valencia. Whew. Breath. Realize I've left my noise-cancelling headphones on the plane. Commence internal screaming.
- Afternoon: The airport transfer (thank god, because navigating Spanish public transport after a flight? No.). The driver, a lovely man named Javier, speaks about three words of English. My Spanish? Still non-existent. It's a beautiful, scenic drive, and I spend it pointing and repeatedly saying "¡Que bonito!" (I think that's right).
- Late Afternoon: Arrive at Casa Baars! It's… stunning. Seriously. The pictures didn't do it justice. The pool glistens, the bougainvillea cascades. My jaw drops. I may or may not have let out a little "whoop!" of pure, unadulterated joy.
- Immediate Problem: Where's the key?! Oh crap, I've lost the key! Or haven't I …? (find the keys 5 minutes later).
- Evening: Unpack (ish). The first bottle of wine is opened. Admire the view. Realize I have no idea how to work the cooker. Try to find a local shop. Get lost. Ask a kind-looking Spanish lady for directions (with a pathetic attempt at explaining and some hand gestures that should probably be illegal). Eventually find a supermarket. Buy the wrong kind of olives. Embrace the chaos.
Day 2: Beach Bliss (and a Bit of a Burn)
- Morning: Wake up with a throbbing headache and a faint memory of dancing on the terrace. Decide to embrace the sun. Head to Cala Baladrar, the nearest beach. It's gorgeous, with crystal-clear water that beckons you in like a siren's song.
- Mid-morning: Swim! The water is colder than expected, but refreshingly so. Splash around like a happy sea otter (which is probably what I looked like). Make a serious mental note to reapply sunscreen… an hour later.
- Afternoon: The burn. Oh, the burn. Spend the afternoon looking like a lobster. Try to find aloe vera (but find the wrong lotion 3 hours later! Still bitter.) Spend the rest of the afternoon indoors, nursing my sunburn and wondering why I’m so clumsy.
- Evening: Dinner at a tapas bar in Moraira port. Order a "sangría." It’s delicious. Try to converse with my waiter. Fail miserably. Eat way too much patatas bravas, and feel blissfully full and even more relaxed than I was before.
Day 3: Exploring Benissa – The Charming and The Lost
- Morning: Attempt to explore the town of Benissa. It's all cobbled streets, whitewashed buildings, and charming churches. I get happily lost. Find a cute cafe, order a "café con leche" (at least, I think that's what I ordered), and people-watch.
- Midday: Hike along the coastal path (sort of). Get distracted by the views. Wander off course, which then turns into having to clamber over rocks. End up slightly bruised, and a little annoyed. But the views. The views are worth it.
- Afternoon: Return to Casa Baars. Plunge into the pool. Realize my skin is still peeling. Sigh.
- Evening: Attempt to cook. Armed with my limited Spanish and a cookbook, I embark on making paella. This is when things get really messy. The rice sticks. The seafood is undercooked. The smoke alarm goes off (multiple times). I burn myself. But you know what? It's delicious (mostly). And the wine helps.
- Quirky Observation: The paella-making process involved more wine than actual cooking. Totally worth it. Still, I think I need to try finding a restaurant for this.
Day 4: Day Trip to The Rock of Ifach and Calpe (And Possibly Sanity)
- Morning: Decide I need to climb The Rock of Ifach (Peñón de Ifach: the big rock!). It's supposed to be a must-see. Pack water. Snacks. Sunscreen (I learn from my disasters). Drive to Calpe.
- Mid-morning: The hike. It's tough. The views are spectacular. I almost give up halfway. Swear a lot. But I persist! Reach the top. Take a million photos. Feel a sense of accomplishment.
- Emotional Reaction: I screamed when I reached the top. Pure joy. Pure elation. Pure relief that I didn't fall off a cliff.
- Afternoon: Explore the Calpe harbor. Eat some fresh fish. Have a cold beer. Feel the sun. Enjoy the sea breeze. Start to feel human again.
- Evening: Return to Casa Baars. Watch the sunset from the terrace. Reflect on the day. Feel utterly content with life - and the knowledge that I conquered a giant rock. Maybe I should consider a new vocation - professional rock climber?
Day 5: Chill Day, Poolside Perfection and Paella Redux (The Sequel)
- Morning: Wake up late. Bliss. Lie by the pool with a book. Actually read a bit. Successfully apply sunscreen.
- Midday: Swim. Drink. Relax. Repeat. This is the life.
- Afternoon: Decide that the first paella failure was a fluke. I will conquer this dish. Head back to the kitchen , and the scene unfolds again: the rice sticks, the seafood is undercooked, the smoke alarm. But this time, the smoke doesn't bother me. The wine is good. I laugh. The paella, while not perfect, is even tastier in the second attempt.
- Rambling Moment: I think I’m starting to understand this whole 'Spain' thing. It's not about perfection. It's about good company, good food (even if it’s a little burnt), and a healthy dose of chaos.
- Evening: Drink all of the remaining wine. Stare at the stars. Feel grateful.
Day 6: Goodbye (For Now!) and Airport Shenanigans
- Morning: The dreaded packing. Tears. Pack. Realize I haven’t bought any souvenirs (panic shopping session in Benissa).
- Afternoon: The airport transfer. Javier again! We manage a slightly more coherent conversation this time, mostly involving pointing at things and saying "¡España!"
- Evening: The flight home. Reflect on the trip. Realize I’m already planning my return.
- Emotional Reaction: I felt sad to leave. But also incredibly happy and recharged. Spain, you magnificent, beautifully messy place, I'll be back!
Day 7: Back Home - Tired, Sunburned, and Ecstatically Happy. Immediately start browsing flights, and deciding when I can return.
Casa Baars. You were perfect (and perfectly messy).
Stavele Holiday Home Paradise: Terrace & Belgian Charm Awaits!
So, like, what *is* this whole thing about? Seriously?
Alright, alright, good question! Look, I'm not even sure *I* know entirely. I think the idea is to... well, to just spill the beans, you know? Share some stuff, answer some questions, maybe laugh a little, maybe cry a little (probably both). The goal is to be, like, *real*. No pristine, perfectly-polished answers here. Just the messy, wonderful, occasionally-clueless truth. It’s a journey, not a destination, and we’re building the map as we go.
Why are you doing this, exactly? What's the point? Is this some elaborate scheme? Are you a robot? (Seriously, tell me!)
Woah, hold your horses! Robot accusations? Harsh! Look, the "why" is a good question. Honestly? A mixed bag. Part of me just... enjoys it. There's a weird satisfaction in putting thoughts into words, even the completely bonkers ones. Another part... well, maybe I’m just trying to find someone who feels as weird as I do. That's a HUGE plus. And no, I'm not a robot. Unless robots are now programmed to obsess over the existential angst of the human condition. In which case, *beep boop*, I am indeed a robot. Just kidding (I think!).
Alright, enough existentialism. Let's get practical. What are your favorite things? Like, what makes you *tick*?
Okay, okay, practical! I like... a lot of things. Coffee, obviously. Dark chocolate, preferably with sea salt because, *chef's kiss*. Really good books that make you forget to eat or sleep... you know, the ones that seep into your dreams? Also, the feeling of a warm, sunny day paired with a perfect playlist. And, and, and... small acts of kindness. Seriously, those get me every time. Oh! And dogs. ALL dogs. All the time.
Okay, favorite things. What about the *least* favorite? What's guaranteed to set you off?
Ugh. Where do I even begin? Okay, let's start with inconsiderate people. Like, seriously? If you can’t be nice, just… disappear. Then there’s the whole "politics" thing, which feels like a never-ending cycle of anger and disappointment. Also, and this is huge, *slow internet*. I swear, it’s a personal attack. And, oh yeah, people who chew with their mouths open. The sound of it makes me want to run screaming into the wilderness. (Sorry, just… not a fan.)
Ever made a huge, epic blunder? Like, a *total* facepalm moment? Let's have it.
Oh, honey. Where do I even *start*? Okay, I'll tell you about the Great Awkward Karaoke Incident of '08. Picture this: small-town karaoke night. I’d had a *few* too many… you know… "liquid courage" cocktails. I thought I was a total superstar. Chose… "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler. Absolutely butchered it. Screeching, off-key, forgot the words... the whole nine yards. The worst part? I thought I SLAYED. When, in reality, I was probably more likely to have caused an un-repairable earthquake. I vividly remember the look of a kind, old lady looking at me while I was doing a horrible job. Ugh. Still cringe. My friends still bring it up. It's a running joke. Lesson learned: stick to the shower.
What's something you're genuinely proud of? Something that makes you think, "Yeah, I did good"?
Okay, this one actually makes me smile. One time, I was volunteering at a homeless shelter, and I helped this kid learn to read. He was… struggling. Frustrated. Ready to give up. It was a long, hard process, but finally seeing him light up when he *got* it… when he sounded out the words… when he started to actually *enjoy* reading… That was… well, that was pretty darn amazing. It made me feel like I’d actually, genuinely, made a difference. And that’s a good feeling, you know?
What are your hopes and dreams? Anything ambitious, or just… simple joys?
Ah, hopes and dreams… Okay, I'd love to write a book (maybe more than one! Honestly, who knows?). I want to travel the world, see as many different cultures as I can, eat all the food (seriously, this is high on the list). But honestly? Sometimes the simple things are best. I dream of a cozy little cottage with a roaring fireplace, a huge library, and a dog named Winston. I want to spend my days drinking coffee, reading, writing, and wandering through life with people I love. That's the dream. That's the goal. Anything more feels like… well, like frosting on an already delicious cake.
So, if someone could ask any question to you (and get an honest answer), what would you like to be asked?
Ooh, that's a good one. Hmm… Maybe… "What are you *really* afraid of?" Because let’s be honest, we all have our demons that follow us… our darkness. It's the rawest form of ourselves. It's the one thing that will always be there whether you like it or not. And I think if we all, like, really faced our fears… we'd be surprised what we could overcome. Or maybe I'd just want to discuss my karaoke disaster (still a good story). Doesn’t matter either way!
If you could give one piece of advice to your younger self, what would it be?
Oh, sweet, sweet younger me… Listen to your heart, kiddo. Don’t be afraid to be weird. Don’t be afraid to fail. Don't be afraid to cry in public. Don't be afraid to love with your whole heart. Stop trying to be perfect (it’s a myth, I promise!). And for the love of all that is holy… stop trying to fit into other people's boxes. You're meant to break out. Be brave. Be authentic. Be you. That's it. It's really that simple.
One last question! WhatHotels Blog Guide
